In January of 1987, an event occurred in Forsyth County, Georgia, that drastically changed my life. I spent all day witnessing a civil rights event that was was the largest of its kind since the 1960's, with over 20,000 people in attendance, and approximately 1,500 Klan members and Klan sympathizers as well. I took approximately 200 photos that day ... (unfortunately, they were all destroyed in a fire in 2000.) But they told a story. The first photo I took was of a redneck woman sitting in the back of her pickup truck in a Wal-Mart parking lot, with a rebel flag in one hand, and a sign in the other hand which read "Go Home Niger!" (Yes, that was HER misspelling.) That photo was sold to the Atlanta Journal-Constitution, and was on the front page of their newspaper the next day. But the last photo taken late in the day was of a 12 year old white boy, looking obviously exhausted after a long day, leaning against a tree, and holding a sign which read, "Let There Be Peace On Earth, and Let it Begin With Me."
You may wonder why I am reliving this memory nearly 27 years later. Trust me, I relive that event in my mind at least briefly every single day of every single year since that day. It was, for me, a life changing event. Driving down Georgia Highway 400 from Cumming back to Atlanta that day, I had to pull my car over. I got out of my car and prayed. I was only 22 years old, but I prayed like I had never prayed before! For nearly an hour, kneeled down beside me car, I prayed. I begged God to purge me of any prejudiced bone I may have in my body. I vowed to never tell a racist joke again. I vowed to judge a man by his character, not his skin color.
Although I had accepted Christ into my heart a little more than four years earlier, I have never been as close to Christ as I was that night just outside of Cumming, Georgia. I literally felt Jesus hold me in His arms, and hug me tight. I was cleansed.
In 2005, I got to spend some time with Bill Willis, a former Buckeye and Cleveland Brown. He helped break the color barrier in the NFL in 1946 when joining the NFL, a whole year before Jackie Robinson did so in baseball. We talked for several hours about what it was like to be a black man playing in the NCAA and NFL back in the late 40's and early 50's. Yes, many away games, he had to sit in a separate train car, some hotels in cities of the opponents wouldn't allow him to stay in their hotel. Much of the stories you've heard, especially in movies such as "The Express", about Ernie Davis. But I asked him a question that I wasn't really prepared to hear his answer. I asked him, "What is the biggest difference in people's hearts between back then and now?" His answer, "Nothing at all." He went on to share that white people today don't typically show their prejudices outwardly, but the prejudices still exist as much as they did back then. Mr. Willis then asked me which neighborhood I lived in, and when I told him, he was a bit shocked, since I was living just off Cleveland Avenue in a pretty rough part of town at that time. But he went on to make a point that all across America, we still have black churches, and white churches. We still have black neighborhoods, and white neighborhoods. Go to any restaurant, and you'll see blacks eating with blacks, and whites eating with whites.
I have no doubt that each and every friend I have is not prejudiced at all. Or at least, that is what each person would tell me. However, what do your actions show? When you see a person of a different race, do you see their race, or do you see an individual? Be honest with yourself. And pray. Ask God to cleanse you from any and every sin in your life, even those you are unaware of. What will you do, if when you get to Heaven, the Pearly Gates are opened, and when Jesus opens the door to welcome you, you see He's black? What will you do? What will you say to Him? What will He say to you?
What does the Bible say about racism? Let's take a look:
"There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is no male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus." ... Galatians 3:28
"Do not judge by appearances, but judge with right judgment." ... John 7:24
"For there is no distinction between Jew and Greek; for the same Lord is Lord of all, bestowing his riches on all who call on him." ... Romans 10:12
"Whoever says he is in the light and hates his brother is still in darkness.: 1 John 2:9
"So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them." ... Genesis 1:27
"But if you show partiality, you are committing sin and are convicted by the law as transgressors" ... James 2:9
"A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another." ... John 13:34
"For God shows no partiality." ... Romans 2:11
"For just as the body is one and has many members, and all the members of the body, though many, are one body, so it is with Christ. For in one Spirit we were all baptized into one body—Jews or Greeks, slaves or free—and all were made to drink of one Spirit." ... 1 Corinthians 12:12-13
"And have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge after the image of its creator. Here there is not Greek and Jew, circumcised and uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave, free; but Christ is all, and in all." ... Colossians 3:10-11
"So whatever you wish that others would do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets." ... Matthew 7:12
"After this I looked, and behold, a great multitude that no one could number, from every nation, from all tribes and peoples and languages, standing before the throne and before the Lamb, clothed in white robes, with palm branches in their hands" ... Revelation 7:9
"So Peter opened his mouth and said: “Truly I understand that God shows no partiality, but in every nation anyone who fears him and does what is right is acceptable to him." ... Acts 10:34-35
"Masters, do the same to them, and stop your threatening, knowing that he who is both their Master and yours is in heaven, and that there is no partiality with him." ... Ephesians 6:9
"And behold, a lawyer stood up to put him to the test, saying, “Teacher, what shall I do to inherit eternal life?” He said to him, “What is written in the Law? How do you read it?” And he answered, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind, and your neighbor as yourself.” And he said to him, “You have answered correctly; do this, and you will live.” But he, desiring to justify himself, said to Jesus, “And who is my neighbor?" ... Luke 10:25-37
"For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but in order that the world might be saved through him." ... John 3:16-17
Recently, I was deeply hurt by the actions of a couple of members of the leadership of the church in which I am a member. One of these leaders out and out lied to me directly. The other spread false rumors.
When doing work with the homeless community, many times some of the homeless people do not receive what they ask for. Drama and lies spread rampant. Unfortunately, one of the people who stayed in one of the camps wanted more than I was able to offer. I will not participate in anything that is either immoral or illegal.
With that said, let's just say I was blackmailed. If I did not provide a certain person what they wanted, I would pay a price. I didn't, and I am still paying the price to this day!
I didn't know what the price was going to be. Until months later. But here is what the person has done as retaliation. They spread throughout their particular homeless camp a story that both J and I kept this person detained in my basement for over two weeks, tied up with rope, raping them repeatedly, and refusing to let them leave my home. Ironic how this story began right after national news was talking about Ariel Castro being arrested in Cleveland for doing something very similar!
Fast forward several months. I get a call from one of the leaders at the church wanting to talk with me. He informs me that he has received an e-mail that shared a story very similar to what I just shared. He informs me that police are investigating and taking it very serious. I am then told that the church no longer wants me to serve in any volunteer capacities.
I understand. Yet, I don't. So I call the Columbus Police and inquire about the so-called investigation. I offer to go to the station and give a DNA sample to prove my innocence. The police inform me that there is no investigation. They appreciate my willingness to cooperate, but inform me there is nothing to cooperate with! They go further to inform me that yes, they are aware of a rape story from this individual. However, they said that this person has filled out over 50 rape claims in the past four years.
The next day I get a call from this individual's case worker. She is only allowed to talk with me because he gave written permission over six months prior. She informs me that she too is aware of the lies that he was spreading. She was devastated over their actions. She went on to share with me additional lies that he had been telling, including to me personally. He had always claimed that he had moved to Columbus when he was 12 years old from New York with his mother. Two years later, his mom died of leukemia, and he had been living on the streets for four years since her death. His mom is still alive and well. She wants nothing to do with him because of his compulsive lying.
Back to the particular leader within the church. If he had shared with me what he knew, and asked me to step back for a while, I would have completely cooperated and understood. However, he took it a step further and started sharing the news with others. And from there, it got spread, and spread, and spread. Gossip loves to spread like wildfire.
Another leader within the church, when confronted over a certain issue indirectly related to this wound up lying to me through e-mail. This person recently apologized to me. I was quick to tell them they were forgiven, but have I truly forgiven from my heart? Have I truly forgiven the other one for spreading the gossip? I want to say I have, but I just don't know.
This past weekend, I had a long conversation with J. He has been completely aware of the full story all along as well. It was about a month later that he started coming up with different reasons of why he didn't want to go to church each weekend. So we talked about it in depth this weekend. J has some very strong protective instincts. He is extremely angry at how he perceived the church to treat me after the stories started to spread. In fact, he was even more angry than I ever was. But it didn't stop there. He went on to say that he feels as though both the leadership of the church and the majority of the church body he's come into contact with are "stuck up." When J first started attending, he established a special bond with the leader of the music ministry. J feels as though he is now being shunned by that person. J says that if he ever tries to approach the Pastor, the Pastor ignores him and walks away. I tried my very best to explain to J that in a church that has between 4000-5000 people a weekend in attendance, the leaders get very busy and distracted easily, and he shouldn't take it personally. But J isn't buying it. He feels as though he was treated rudely one time too many. He no longer wants to return period. He is begging me to find a new church, and then he'll be more than willing to start going to church again. But he never wants to step foot inside CWC period.
Forgiveness. So much easier said than done. For me personally, it seems much easier to forgive if I see change within the one that needs the forgiveness. But when the repentance isn't there, it's much more difficult.
BUT ... is that the way it should be? I don't believe so. You see, God has forgiven me for ALL of my sins ... past, present, and future. I haven't always been repentant, yet God has still forgiven me anyway!
To the entire leadership team of CWC, I forgive you all. Some of you may still feel blinded and feel as though you did nothing wrong, and that's okay. I forgive you anyway! To those who have treated J rudely (and yes, I have seen it firsthand to know it's truly been a bit rude at times), I forgive you.
To the 18 year old who loves to spread complete lies ... I FORGIVE YOU! You are no longer welcome in my home, and I do not wish to have any association with you again period, but I still forgive you!
And while I am at it ... to the person who drives the red mini van with a Cypress decal on the back window who cut me off and then gave me the middle finger on Rome Hilliard Road, I forgive you as well!
"And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins." ... Mark 11:25
